Wednesday, April 29, 2015

life lately.

Oh how i've been waiting to sit down in a quiet moment like the one I find myself in right now and have the opportunity to write!  For weeks I've been itching to get back into blogging, but there was always something keeping me away.  Nursing baby. A baby who wanted to be held.  Pure exhaustion. Choosing that moment to actually spend some time with the Lord.  Dishes piled up in the sink.  Ok, you got me, it was never dishes piled up in the sink.  I mean, yes they are there, I would certainly never choose them over a chance to write!

Yes, life is looking a little different these days, but oh, how incredibly sweet it is.  We are adjusting well to being parents of two.  Eli has been fantastic! He loves his sister with every ounce of his little heart, and tells us over and over again how much he loves having a sister.  Sure, we have to remind him numerous times a day to be gentle around her and that his kitty does not belong on her face, but God has blessed us in the transition period.

He has also blessed us with a baby who loves to sleep and has since day one.  In the beginning we were a little concerned about the amount of time she spent sleeping.  I was setting my alarm throughout the night to make sure she got plenty to eat, otherwise, I'm pretty sure she would've slept through the night much earlier.

All these ways we have felt blessed make up for the difficulty we did experience.  You knew it had to be too good to be true, right?  No one has a newborn and gets off that easy!  Our difficulty came in the form of breastfeeding.  It started out with Naomi's struggle to latch, which resulted in her losing too much weight prior to our discharge from the hospital.  I was placed on a pretty aggressive feeding plan with follow up appointments scheduled for the following week.  The plan left me exhausted, physically, mentally and emotionally.  It took her 2 weeks to gain enough weight before we were released from the feeding plan and we had one good week before I was suddenly experiencing excruciating pain during our nursing sessions.  After a week of not knowing what was going on, I got in to see our Lactation Consultant who informed me that I had developed an abscess.  I was immediately scheduled to see a breast surgeon who promptly told me she would have to drain it.  Let's just say it was the worst pain I had ever felt in my entire life.  The anesthesia didn't work so I felt the whole thing!   I laid on the table screaming and crying out in pain, mostly really angry with God that He hadn't answered my prayers for healing prior to this moment.  It was another 2 weeks before I was healed enough that I could feed Naomi again on the right side with minimal pain.

But throughout the whole experience, God drew Mike and I closer, and equipped him to step up in ways like he never had before.  For instance, helping me put a new dressing on my wound when we got home the day I had the abscess drained.  If you know my husband, you know this is a REALLY big deal.  While sitting in the OR during my c-section for Naomi, behind the curtain with no visuals of anything remotely gross, he was completely nauseated and ready to pass out.  But he helped me remove the gauze and looked at my open wound!  During every feeding that resulted in me sobbing and cursing, he was there to lay hands on me and cry out to God when I didn't have the strength to do it.  He has been my rock, and I couldn't be more thankful!

Now here we are, two months in and finding our way.  We are still learning and we don't always get it right.  We eat cereal for dinner. Eli gets to bed way too late.  The kids go a few days without a bath.  Smoothies get splattered all over the wall.  The floors go unswept.  The living room looks like an obstacle course.  But mostly, we are cherishing being a family of four.  We are loving and laughing and playing and and learning and growing and making memories.

My quiet moment is now over.  A little barefooted boy with crazy bedhead has joined me on the couch.  Soon the little one will begin shifting in the swing as she wakes for an afternoon feeding.  I will have to set the computer aside and pray for more opportunities just like today, but until then I'll be taking each day as it comes and finding joy in the little things and drinking lots of coffee!!